I'm a WEANER

I had planned not to wean Butterfly at ALL.  I was dead set on letting her self wean when she was good and ready.

And yet here we are.

I did nightwean her out of desperation for some sleep a few months ago.  That was hard, but we managed. 

Then, I guess about a month ago, breastfeeding was suddenly too hard.  And I mean suddenly.  Its not painful, or draining.  Its an aversion.  Its like her suck changed overnight, and I could actually FEEL her sucking.  That might sound weird but breastfeeding has never felt like that to me.  And I can't STAND it!  I dropped her feeds to one a day, and one to go to bed at night.  That worked for a few weeks, but then it got worse.  I stopped being able to handle breastfeeding at ALL.  So I cut her back to one feed to go to sleep at night, and for a few weeks thats been OK.  Some nights I can hang on until she's asleep, other nights I have to detach her after only a minute because I just can't grit my teeth through it.

Tonight she barely got 30 seconds.

It has been REALLY rough on Butterfly.  She is such a booby monster!  If she had her way she would feed every hour around the clock.  At 2 years and 8 months old!

Its extremely hard to try to explain to her at night.  She bursts into tears when I stop the feed, and tries desperately to convince me to keep going... "but my need Mummy milk cos my don't feel very well!" "but my is hungry!" "how bout we dust try one booboo?" 

It breaks my heart.

People who don't breastfeed, or wean their infants, have no idea what I'm on about.  "Well its about time anyway.  She's probably gotten all of the nutrients she can out of it anyway!".  Ummm... no.  Breastmilk is as good for a child on the day they wean as the day they are born. 

I feel like, despite my good intentions and my grand plans, my body has decided for me that enough is enough.  In my mind I can recall nature documentaries where mother elephants start walking off on their offspring when its time to wean.  So nature does not always let the child choose.

This makes me feel a little better, but I'm still very sad about it.  I've put so much time and energy and effort into breastfeeding Butterfly for almost 3 years, I never wanted it to end like this!  The tears and the grief on her part are difficult to deal with.  All I can do is try to explain to her that I would feed her if I could and hope she understands.  Something that has always been so bonding, relaxing and wonderful is suddenly causing misery.  This sucks!

I've breastfed Butterfly through a c section recovery, with added cracked and bleeding nipples.
I've breastfed Butterfly through periods of intense hormonal feeding pain.
I've breastfed Butterfly through recovery for a life threatening ectopic pregnancy.
I've breastfed Butterfly through periods of hormonal aversion.

This is just... different.  There's no curling my toes and suffering through it this time. 

Its time to let go.

And I just might cry...

Garden on WHEELS!

So the other Butterfly and I pooled our money and splurged on a GORGEOUS concrete owl planter, sorry I'm too lazy to go take a picture of it right now!  Anyway it is amazing, but I've actually found more excitement in upcycling my own planters this week!

Here is what I've come up with:

Planter on WHEELS!  I bought this old truck (?train) from an opshop a year ago.  Butterfly never was that keen on playing with it.  I just drilled drainage holes in the bottom and filled it with organic potting mix and some organic flowers we had grown from seed!

UPDATE: This totally just rotted and fell apart in the weather!  LOL

My Op Shop SCORE today!  $5 old dolls cot! Its quite large, I plan to remove the bottom and pile up dirt underneath it and plant in the centre.  I was going to do a full bed of flowers like this one, but I think this will be cuter!  What would you plant in it?  I'm thinking strawberries?  Lavender?  Just flowers?  I'm keen to know your opinion! 

Another score today, $5 old glass lampshade!  Looks bigger IRL.  I'm going to line it, hang chains from it and hang it upside down and plant flowers in it :)

I am so excited to keep coming up with upcycling ideas for Butterfly's garden!  Ahhh I love op shopping!

PEACE

DIY outdoor percussion instrument

My latest project on the footprint farm is to make Butterfly a "Secret Garden"!  I was going to plant her a "sunflower cubby house" but with the amount of snakes here, I thought it safer to go grander and have more space between walking area and garden :)

This is the view of the garden from the front (obviously the plants are all still very young as they were just planted!) The idea is that the plants will act as "walls" for the garden.  We have planted a green grape vine and a purple grape vine either side of the archway for a delicious living arch!

This is the view fron the other side... we scored the old square bathtub from our neighbour, it will be turned into a pond for frogs to breed in :) (you can get solar powered fountains for ponds!  Eee!) Those logs up the back are also from our neighbour, old bridge sleepers we are making a bench seat out of.

I bought a green and a red bowl from an antique store to make bird baths from (my MIL is a nurse and has witnessed a toddler who was crushed to death by a stone birdbath that the child pulled onto itself... a rare event but enough to warrant me searching for other options!)

In the photo above you may notice an old trampoline frame on its side... that is the frame for our outdoor percussion instrument!  I saw the idea here

To make your own percussion instrument like ours you will need:

An old trampoline frame

All weather rope (its no use if it deteriorates in the sun!)

A bunch of old pots, pans, metal cups, whatever you can find!  Ask your friends and neighbours or raid your local opshop (I just about cleaned mine out!)

Metal spoons for banging

Star pickets

Scissors or secateurs (to cut rope)

Flour

Water

Food colouring

Freddo frog

(those last four are for entertaining your toddler while you work!)

First, we lay the tramp on its side...its surprisingly stable as is but we then hammered some star pickets into the ground and secured them to the frame, just to make sure it doesn't fall down on the children!

I lay out my pots and pans in the position I think I will hang them in while Butterfly investigates the flour packet!

Bang bang BANG! I strung the pots and pans in rows, starting from the bottom. 

I got hubby to drill the old spring holes right through so I could tie the rope through them.  I am no good at knots, don't ask me what "type" of knot this is!  Notice the vine, I planted a passionfruit vine in the hopes it will grow and cover the frame to make it look more purrrty!

I tied each item onto the rope so they don't slide around

Viola!  Upcycled percussion instrument! 

I intentionally made it a little "skew iff" to match my personality!  I don't like things to be inch perfect, thats no fun :) 

I tied ropes vertically to support the horizontal ropes holding the "instruments"

After I took this picture I used the leftover rope to tie onto the sides of the trampoline to give the passionfruit vine more places to climb.

Considerations:

This is NOISY!  I'd be wary of putting one in a suburban backyard.  If you do, be considerate of the times your children bash on it (I'd even ask neighbours if they have babies/work night shifts and need quiet at weird hours)

Try to hang your pots and pans in such a way that they won't blow in the wind and hit each other or the tramp frame... unfortunately this was an afterthought for me!  We have WICKED strong wind here and I don't think the neighbours would appreciate incessant banging in a storm :S So I may have to tweak this!

Make the rope as tight as you can, and make sure the "holes" are large... you want to eliminate any risk of strangulation

Try to pick up some coloured items to create an interesting look, and vary the "types" of kitchen implements you find!  This varies the look and sound of each "instrument".  Coloured tin cups would look amazing!  Why not also hang some metal spoons? 

Construction hazards:

Beware sharp metal peices at the back where you drill through!  (Yes you get the benefit of ME bleeding up a storm to let you know these things!)

Rope burn.  Just... owww

Do not construct in the middle of a scorching day.  You DUNCE!

Beware the toddler who is tired of playing with flour and water alone and is creeping up behind you with sticky, goopy hands...

Just let your imagination run wild!  A friend of mine has a round tramp frame and I'm so keen to see how that one turns out! 

Peace

(but no quiet!)

Cesarean according to a 2 year old

This morning Butterfly and I were going through her newborn clothes, putting them on her dolly (Abby).   For fun, I got out her photo album of when she was born, to show her how small she used to be, wearing the same clothes as her doll!  We opened the book and landed on the photos from her C section.

She stared.  She got upset.  "Whats THAT Mummy?"
"Thats the day you were born"
"Whose THAT?" pointing to the OB holding her, and sounding very upset
"Thats the Dr who delivered you"
"Where's MUMMY?" VERY upset now
"I'm there darling, thats my tummy, see?"
"WHERE'S MUMMY?  WHERE'S DADDY?"  Crying her eyes out
"We are there, but um, they had to take you and weigh you before they bought you to me, see?"
"WHY?  Who is that?" Pointing to the other theatre staff
"I don't actually know sweetheart, people who helped with the operation"

She was in my lap at this point, crying her eyes out, wanting to be held. I'd close the book, but every so often she would open it again and ask some more questions.  Tears tears tears.

The things she couldn't understand were:
WHY was a strange man in gloves holding her?
WHERE was Mummy and Daddy?
Who were those other people?
Why did Mummy have a monitor on her finger and chest?  (She is very sensitive about those things since my ectopic, I can't wear a bandaid around her because she frets so much about my wellbeing)

I didn't have good answers for her.  I wished this had come AFTER Christmas so she had her Mamamor VBAC doll so I could show her how she was born, and how babies SHOULD be born.  (Yes I said should.  Babies should be born naturally, by their empowered mother, not by a surgeon.  SOME C sections are necessary, we all know that, but the rate sits around 30%.  Unacceptable)

I didn't have the doll.  All I could do was hold her and let her grieve and explain that babies are usually pushed out through a Mummy's vagina, but that I chose a c section because I didn't know any better.  Is this too much information for a 2 year old?  No.  Its the truth.  She was extremely disturbed by the photos and I confronted it with her and helped her through it.  I could have closed the book, I could have spun her some sugar coated junk about what it was all about.  But that's not how we roll. 

There is nothing like a toddler to paint things so simply that it leaves you wondering... why WAS some guy holding her up like a trophy?  Where was her MUM?  Why were there so many people there?  Why was Mummy hooked up to machines? 

Answer: Mummy should have been holding you.  Those people shouldn't have been there.  We should have been in a dimly lit room with only those who loved you... you should have been pushed out and caught by Mumma... who was neither hooked up to machines nor being cut open.

Trust a 2 year old to understand how birth should be.  If only everyone did.

Watertank Mud ART!

This afternoon Butterfly and I went out to play in the mud.  We started digging a trench to run water down... and I don't exactly know what happened... but we were soon painting the water tank with MUD!!  It was rad fun, it looks so earthy and cool, and we have clay which is wonderful and smooth!

The beginnings of our art...

Butterfly gets the hang of it... while Mumma paints her some native animals...

Naturally things progressed to body art...

A bit of this and a bit of SPLAT

The madness culminated in a full body mud pack for Butterfly! 

Man we had soooo much fun!  I find the best activities are the ones that happen by accident!  Having said that I'm planning on doing this again (I'm sure the rain has cleaned our slate by now)... so Sausage Mama, do remember to bring some old clothes when you come to visit!!

PEACE

Guest blog... Kids and the Media by MEGGZ

Meggz is a regular on The Smallest Carbon Footprint with heaps of awesome eco tips! I've learnt a lot from her. This week she posted this on the wall, and I wanted to publish it as a blog because I found it so interesting and thought provoking! Thankyou again Meggz :)

"I wonder if any other parents out there who are environmentally conscious include limiting modern technology to their "green" parenting plan ? My youngest daughter Shorty who is 13 does not watch TV, we moved to an area many years ago that does not get any form of TV reception. I have copped a lot of flack over the years in regards to my hippy lifestyle, but the lack of TV really got some people angry (family). It is my child surely I can choose ?? Shorty does not need to watch the weather channel to know what type of day we are having, she has learnt to watch the animals around us eg: cows and horses under the trees = rain for several days, black cockatoos screeching over our property = rain in the next few days, red sky in the morning means bad weather is coming, red sky at night means good weather, ants coming out of the ground = rain. She does not need to watch the news, not because I want her to become ignorant about world events, more because I do not want her seeing the way the media tends to portray these events as bigger than what they are, promoting an over focus on pain and suffering. She does not need to watch home and away or anyother teen program that teaches our children to lie, cheat, sleep around ect. What she does need to know is facts, without all the over dramatised aspects attached. We read books, encyclopedias, we write stories, in short we learn facts then after we have mastered that we add in emotional responses. I have seen first hand how my daughter can react to any situation with a clear and level head, without becoming tangled in emotions. She learns how to "read" people by spending many hours watching animals, their body language and how you can predict accurately what their actions will be without the use of words or language. I hope all of this will help her to become a better person. I am proud of the gorgeous young lady she has become, others see her as a socially stunted child. Yes if she does not like a discussion in the school yard she will walk away and sit by herself, or if the other kids are misbehaving in any way she will detach herself from them. Still I get told "we are concerned she is spending so much time alone" Shorty enjoys her own company, she is not afraid to be alone, she is comfortable in her own skin and most importantly she is respectful and polite, she knows all people are different and we have no right to force our opinions on others. How many of you have thought about this aspect of parenting? Is it a path you think you would like to take ? Or do you like so many people around me feel as though I am doing the wrong thing ? Would really like some feedback :) Oh as an after thought, Shorty is ranked in the top 4% of her Australian peers intellectually, her grades are above and beyond. External environmental influences do play an important role in your childs behaviour, intelligence and judgement.

My reasons for posting my message isnt for a pat on the back or for Shorty to look like a saint, I just hope it may make ppl think a little deeper. I home schooled my now 17 yr old daughter, I found as she grew (teenage years) she rebelled a lot due to her feeling like she has "missed out" on so many things. Living in harmony with nature but seeing exciting things on TV made it hard for her. It was at this point I decided to approach things differently. Shorty (13) has never seen TV ads showing the toys that mum says are bad come to life and talk and become your best friend. She has never seen happy meals ads that transport you to a magical kiddy place while you are eating them. This made living as naturally as we can a whole lot easier. Sure she now sees some of these ads when we visit other ppl but she is old enough to not be interested in them, the foundations were layed when she was little :) I remember a long time ago at a childs birthday party they had a Dora dvd on, all the kids were yelling & shouting at the TV when asked "what should Dora do" Shorty came out with, Dora should make her own decisions, she shouldnt need or want to know what other ppl want her to do lol yes it got some strange looks off the parents, but I realised what I was doing with her upbringing was having a positive effect on her. She knows she is in control of her life, she makes the decisions, she does not succumb to peer presure. I also should clarify we do have a TV we just dont get TV channels. We do watch documentaries on the weekends and Shortys favourite dvd as a toddler was "Baraka" (google it it is a brilliant movie) Shorty attends a very small selective private school, I choose this path as they respect my way of living and support good manners and morals. She finds it very funny when kids at school go on about twilight movies, we love edward we love jacob ect she always says mum how can they be in love with something thats make believe? Its like being a teenager with an imaginary friend. That will do it for me lol I have typed way way too much on your page as it is :) my only advice would be .... Never underestimate the power the media has to undo all of your "green living attempts" and cause your child to feel like their natural lifestyle is lacking xox Much love, light & laughter to all xox"

Meggzy Moo

Adelle's guide to Hippy Gifting!

This is just for you, my favourite Kate O'Meara...

Usually I forget to link earth friendly gifts until a week before Christmas, when its far too late! This year I'm getting orgumanised!

It is important to think carefully about the gifts you give. I aim for them to be as natural as possible, as earth friendly as possible, and as RAD as possible! There is nothing worse for the environment than giving a gift that someone never uses... or worse, just throws away! You can encourage people to be more earth friendly with carefully thought out gifts like organic personal care, reusable shopping bags or Soapnuts!

Don't forget to check ebay and your local op shop before buying new, you would be surprised at what you might find!

So here are a few ideas for gifts for the whole family.

For the LADIES:
Envirosax pouch! I love these green bags SO much! They look AMAZING and fold down so small. Each pouch comes with 5 Envirosax, and is small enough to carry in your handbag! No more excuses for forgetting your Green Bags!

Neoflam Cookware! Are you aware of the dangers of Teflon? Neoflam provide a non toxic range of non stick cookware, and come in gorgeous colours! Fellow Dalbians, you can get this from Eloquence! Gold Coasters, you want to get your butt into Eco Vida in Burleigh :)

Cheeki stainless steel drink bottle or flask! You can get these from most health food stores. Or for the coffee lover, a reusable coffee cup.

Organic Clothing! Just google it :)

Organic personal care products! With any luck they love them and you won't have to bring your own body wash when visiting yo Mum! Miessence have everything from makeup, shampoo, moisturiser, toothpaste to PERFUME! Also check out their health care section for some awesome products to create health and beauty from within.

A good book! The Anastasia series I've just linked is very hard to find in stores, but Eco Vida stock them :) Its an amazing and mind expanding book! I recieved "Greeniology" by Tanya Ha last year and I adore it! "Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering" by Buckley and anything by Ina May Gaskin are great books for expecting mothers! "The Continuum Concept" by Jean Liedloff is awesome for all mothers (put it on your own wishlist if you haven't read it yet!)

Microfiber cleaning products such as Enjo or Norwex.

Tupperware or, better yet, Pyrex glass storage containers! Down with cling wrap!

Check out some local markets for handmade or upcycled jewellery or clothing!

For the MEN:
GAD. This is going to be a small section. Men are so hard to buy for!
Most recently I got my Dad a Thermos to take soup to work in.

Miessence products such as Ancient Spice Deodorant or Shaving Gel.

A magnetic energy torch

An eco lunchbox (just discovered a new page, buxtonbaby.com.au!)

Organic clothing.

Something to DO! Red Balloon is a website where you can buy vouchers for a drive in a rally car or a hot air balloon ride! So many things to choose from. They have spa packages for women, too.

For the BABIES!
Wooden teethers and rattles: no more yucky pastic ones! The Natural Newborn and Eco Toys have a great selection.

BPA free Boon bath ducks

Modern Cloth Nappies! Some companies will even do personalised embroidered nappies! My faves are Itti Bittis, Bonnibuns, B cheeks and Bambooty.

A Rainstick. Seriously though, go to The Natural Newborn and Eco Toys and search by age group, I can't list out ALL the amazing products in one blog!

An amber teething necklace! Homeopathic teething remedy, great for a nephew or neice

A cardboard box and a wooden spoon. For reals!


For KIDS:

Organic Doll. The Keptin Jr doll is my favourite! And Butterfly's.

Wooden Workbench

Wooden Kitchen and accessories! Best investment I ever made, Butterfly actually has TWO! Also wash out and store some old spice jars, butter containers etc instead of buying expensive play food!

Makedo! Make toys and cars from the materials around you! You might remember I used some Makedo to make moveable knobs on SB's mud pie kitchen...

Wooden Scooter: we haven't tried these but I want to get Butterfly one for her 3rd birthday

Wind Up Torch!

Play Silks! Encourage your child's creativity and imagination!

Calamity Bolt Hobby Horse! Butterfly is getting one! Giddyup! (You will have to wait until the next stocking, check out the facebook page! They are handmade so there are limited numbers)

Mamamor pregnancy and breastfeeding doll: great for a child who might attend their siblings birth!

Glob botanical paints

Livos natural face paint

A toy cash register! Butterfly plays with this more than anything. Again, save up old cereal boxes etc for your own grocery store!

Green Toys cars, trucks and tea set! Made from recycled plastic and BPA free. We love the recycling truck!

STOCKING STUFFERS:
Barbara Lord's Green Cleaner: a small and inexpensive guide to taking care of all household matters the earth friendly way! Not only does green cleaning help the earth, but its very cheap!

The Environmental Toothbrush: comes in adult and childrens sizes, and is compostable once you've finished with it! You can buy them in bulk and use some yourself, and give others as gifts (I find it handy to slip a childrens toothbrush in a present at the last minute)

Trial size bag of Wild Soapnuts! These are the greenest option for washing your clothes available.

Organic Seeds! For the home gardener.

Eco Toys have a great selection of toys under $20... bath ducks, felt play food, puzzles etc!

I could go on and on but this blog has taken me a bajillion years to add links to! The links are to specific products in webstores but have a browse around the rest of the website while you are there. Thankyou to The Natural Newborn, Eco Toys and Eco Vida for being so fracking awesome that I barely had to look beyond these sites! Mwah!

PEACE